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Melgund Township Winter Story Library

The Wolseley Warren - Script

by Eva Suluk | Script

INT. HALLWAY - DAY

BARRY (48), wearing a threadbare sweater and thick wool socks, slams his shoulder into a swollen basement door.

The wood GROANS. It does not budge.

Barry steps back. His breath plumes in the frigid air.

He looks at the thermostat. It reads sixty. He taps the glass. The needle doesn't move.

INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS

A layoff notice sits on the table. 'Encyclopedia Company'.

Barry stares at the paper. He touches the sharp corner of the page.

INT. LIVING ROOM - MOMENTS LATER

Barry sinks into a sagging armchair.

A stack of pristine, faux-leather encyclopedias sits on the end table. Unopened.

He grabs a magazine: *The Self-Sufficient Yeoman*. The paper is cheap, gray.

He flips pages. Past diagrams of solar heaters. He stops.

INSERT - MAGAZINE ARTICLE:

"Harnessing Lagomorphic Thermogenesis" by Alistair Finch.

BACK TO SCENE

Barry reads. He leans forward. He reads it again.

He grabs an envelope from the side table—a gas bill with a red "PAST DUE" stamp.

He fishes a pencil from his pocket. He starts to scribble. Fast. Manic.

Numbers. Multiplications. BTU conversions. He circles a final figure. He underscores it twice.

INT. HALLWAY - CONTINUOUS

Barry stands before the basement door. The envelope is crushed in his fist.

He hurls his weight against the wood.

CRACK.

The jamb splinters. The door swings open into darkness.

INT. KITCHEN - LATER

MARGE (48) stands at the sink, hands submerged in gray, soapy water. She does not turn around.

BARRY

It's not a furnace *made* of rabbits, Marge. It's a symbiotic heating system.

Barry slams the envelope onto the table. He anchors it with a salt shaker.

BARRY

Closed-loop. Metabolic rates. The heat rises. It warms the floorboards. It's physics.

Marge pulls her hands from the water. Her knuckles are red, chapped.

MARGE

You want to put fifty rabbits in our basement.

BARRY

Finch's Law of Thermal Conversion says—

MARGE

Who is Finch?

BARRY

A genius.

MARGE

Where will the droppings go?

BARRY

Fertilizer! High-nitrogen. Tomatoes the size of softballs. Self-sufficiency.

MARGE

The basement floods in April.

BARRY

Raised platforms. Two-by-fours. I have a plan.

Marge turns. She looks at the thermostat in the hall. She rubs her elbows.

MARGE

Cost?

BARRY

Guy in Rockford. Surplus stock. Ten a head.

MARGE

We don't have four hundred dollars.

BARRY

It's an investment. We save a thousand on oil. By March, we're in profit.

Barry steps closer. He smells of cold sweat and desperation.

BARRY

Marge. Please.

Marge looks at the layoff notice on the table. Then at Barry.

MARGE

Get fifty. If we're going to fail, we might as well fail big.

EXT. BOWLING ALLEY PARKING LOT - DAY

GUS (60s), missing front teeth and smelling of diesel, drops a wire cage onto the asphalt.

CLANG.

Inside, white rabbits scramble. Their fur is matted yellow. They look terrified.

GUS

Healthy as horses. You got the cash?

Barry hands over a thick wad of bills. Gus wets his thumb, counting.

INT. FORD PINTO - DAY

Cages are jammed into every inch of the hatchback. The suspension GROANS.

Barry sits in the driver's seat. The smell of ammonia is thick.

He reaches for the dashboard heater.

He turns the knob to OFF.

INT. BASEMENT - NIGHT

Dark. Damp.

Fifty rabbits in cages line the walls. Rows of wire and fur.

The sound is overwhelming. A rhythmic, wet CHEWING.

Barry tapes a thermometer to a wooden support beam.

He steps back. He watches the red line.

It sits at fifty-two degrees.

Barry crosses his arms. He waits.

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